Maus Space

I've continually had a liking for the mystical, but it wasn't until I matured a little iota that I discovered John Maus!
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PostPosted: Fri Apr 25, 2014 3:12 pm 
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john everymaus
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Joined: Wed Oct 12, 2011 2:06 am
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Location: Ohio
online dating seems to be successful?


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PostPosted: Mon Apr 28, 2014 5:01 pm 
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No I have my eyes set, like bigtime SET, on this girl who works at my town's grocery store...it makes me happy that she looks at me when i come through the store! in fact saw her today and she came up to me and started talking! but i was too shy to continue with the conversation...i shut down when that happens ...she's gorgeous and looks like a pisces :truluv:
I haven't dated in a long time or asked anyone out in a long while...i haven't had a crush in a long time too, probably not since the last person i dated...I persuaded her to go on a date with me...then i realized that she was nutso religious :S
gimme tips!!!


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PostPosted: Mon Apr 28, 2014 6:01 pm 
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Location: New England, USA
I wish I could help you, App, but I am a romantic retard. Powerless to attract (or be aware that I have unless it is screamed into my face- which actually has happened to me on the NYC subway: that clanging, malodorous meat market. I did not think that was such a good wooing strategy, but maybe I'm getting too old to play games. Maybe the next chino-wearing Hispanic male to lean over a subway pole and tell me that I'm 'fine 'n' shit' might have a chance). I think it is safe to say that everyone I have 'dated,' I have met on the internet. And then the one I didn't, I met in a graveyard while I was 'ghost hunting' (drinking and telling stories after dark) with a group of friends. To be fair to online dating, my most lasting relationships began as e-courtships. Perhaps because you get to know someone more intimately when you are Skyping with them every day, or perhaps because that tantalizing intangibility of long distance keeps the fantasy alive. I'm trying not to sound jaded, but I despair of ever finding someone who I belong with.
My only tip for you, App, would be to arm yourself with courage and just talk to this girl. Some of us are totally clueless and won't know you are interested unless you make a move.


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PostPosted: Mon Apr 28, 2014 7:06 pm 
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It's tough. I dated very little and only had 2 bona-fide girlfriends my whole life until I met my future wife when I was in my mid-thirties. I must have been in App's situation with the grocery girl lots of times. The question I often struggled with was this: "what if my asking her out is actually insulting to her?" Or in other words, will she think that I think that she's so "easy" that anyone can come over and ask her out? Quite a quagmire of paranoid speculation, and a conundrum that went beyond a simple case of "getting the courage". Say I do summon up the courage to ask her out, I still had to reckon with my perceived presumptuousness. God, what a mess.

Just putting it in words now, and it's almost laughable how far-fetched such a speculation really was. Most people aren't thinking on that many levels. It really is usually just a case of, "ok, this guy's asking me out, he must like me. being liked is good, and that gives me a little lift. I am (not) attracted to him, so I think I will (not) say yes." And that's it. They say yes or no, and no harm done either way. I wish I'd had the steadiness of mind to realize that back when I was stumbling through a mud pit of regret and what-ifs.

I guess in the end it comes down to confidence after all - the idea that I'm not a nuisance to others, that my approach may actually be welcome.


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PostPosted: Mon Apr 28, 2014 7:23 pm 
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Thanks for giving me perspective LL and RG!
I've been with five girls in my entire life so I am not an expert!
Perhaps I'll do something r e a l l y bold and productive this week ... :happy:


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PostPosted: Mon Apr 28, 2014 10:56 pm 
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john everymaus
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Location: Ohio
Keep us updated! Best of luck to you. You as well, LL.


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PostPosted: Tue Apr 29, 2014 4:23 am 
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Thanks, PG. I suppose the grand romantic gesture of my lifetime was moving halfway across the world for someone else: leaving all that I knew behind, being expected to integrate into his society, adapting to culture shock and swallowing homesick misery. I've no doubt others have risked far greater in the name of love (renounced their faith, drank poison, whatever). Still a fairly sweeping gesture, I would say, and I am still here in limbo while the proverbial dust settles. I try to maintain optimism that I might get the chance to act out so fool-hardy and wrecklessly passionate again one day, but maybe there is a lesson to be learnt here. Don't listen to your heart. Your heart is an idiot.


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PostPosted: Tue Apr 29, 2014 4:59 am 
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hippopotamaus

Joined: Tue Aug 05, 2008 10:47 am
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"I shouldve never followed my gut. My gut has shit for brains!"
- High Fidelity (a movie a lot of us music nerds here can relate to)


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PostPosted: Tue Apr 29, 2014 2:13 pm 
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Sage words to live by. Also, never sell a Captain Beefheart record to anyone you suspect might not appreciate it.


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PostPosted: Sat May 10, 2014 4:19 pm 
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john everymaus
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Joined: Wed Oct 12, 2011 2:06 am
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Location: Ohio
Jacob wrote:
Heres a hot dating tip...

MMMMMASTURBATION!!!!!


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PostPosted: Sat May 10, 2014 10:55 pm 
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Tried that. Still single.


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PostPosted: Mon May 12, 2014 9:24 pm 
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anonymaus
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I prefer Mausturbation


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PostPosted: Mon May 12, 2014 11:13 pm 
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Me too, golddust. Me too.


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PostPosted: Mon May 12, 2014 11:26 pm 
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Just had the dreaded phone call from home which always portends bad news. My grandmother died at 94. She was a bit of a witch who always begrudged her age and wouldn't even let me call her 'grandma.' She used to lock my sister and I outside in a blizzard with ice scrapers and would not let us back in until her station wagon (replete with creepy bobblehead bulldogs nodding solemnly on the dashboard) was fully clear of snow. In fact, my mother used to threaten to send my sister and I over there for the weekend if we didn't tidy our room. Although we were not particularly close, I feel acutely aware of how time marches on without me. She was a person I have known my entire life and, at such a distance, I will not even be able to attend her funeral; I was not present during her final hours; have not, in fact, seen her in over three years. Her inappropriate belching and emotional blackmail aside, it is a very discomforting feeling, compounding the homesick desperation which reels within me every day.


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PostPosted: Tue May 13, 2014 12:13 am 
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hippopotamaus

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-


Last edited by MausterofDisguise on Wed Sep 21, 2016 3:16 am, edited 1 time in total.

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